One way Ticket

In the battlegrounds of Religious conversion, you will always hear one battle cry from Christian Evangelists "Freedom of Choice and Religious Practice". I fully agree with them. It is upon individual to choose what religion he follows.

But it seems that this policy do not hold when the wind blows in reverse direction. British priest Reverend David Hart learned this the hard way. Hart, who claims to be "as much a Hindu as a Christian", is currently on a lecture tour to Kerala. While in kerala, he bought a Ganesh idol, conducted a puja for 10 days and subsequently joined a Ganesotsav procession organised by the Kerala unit of Shiv Sena to immerse his idol in the sea. He is also a follower of Lord Krishna, and had offered prayers at his local temple.

Hart, a professor of theology and religious studies at University of Winchester, says: "I celebrated Ganesha puja with the same piety and devotion with which I celebrate the Eucharist or namaz."

His actions has stirred a hot debate in UK and US, with pressure mounting on parish authorities to disrobe him as a priest of the Church of England.

Dr. R. Albert Mohler, Jr., current president of the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary - one of the largest seminaries in the world, offered scathing criticism of the Hindu convert.

"He is the poster-priest for the worst and most mindless form of theological relativism. You would be hard pressed to find two more radically distinct theologies than those of Christianity and Hinduism. He is an idolater who has repudiated Christianity and biblical theism. And now he expects the Church of England to allow him to continue as a priest."

Big B Vs SRK

A Unseemingly comment by Ram Gopal Verma that "Big B is an all time great actor & SRK is accidental Star"(not sure of exacts words) is starting to become a major controversy here in India.

I personally agree with Ram Gopal Verma. Big B is a Great Actor and he is gifted. Same cannot be said for SRK. He is a creation.

Other interesting aspect of this SKR Vs Big B Controversy is the communal overtones. Yesterday I was watching the Times TV and they were running some sort of program in which people cound send their comments. it seems most of the people who were speaking in Favour SRK were from Muslim Community. Like any other issue in India is this also going to take a communal turn?

Killing Our FUTURE for few votes

The Hands which are carrying the National Flag are being broken. These are the same hands to which we would be handing over our nation.
I am sure Mother India might be weeping!

Sexual Harrasment Kerala Ministers Leads by Example

It is a shameful fact that no woman is safe any time of the day in any city in Kerala. The narrow minded and lewd attitude of some men of my state is disgusting. Any woman traveling alone becomes a target of these nasty few. Public transportation can be a nightmare where there is ahigh chance of women being groped or their modest violated. Seems now this behaiviour is spilling over to Airline Travel also with State ministers leading the list of offenders

The latest incident reportedly happened on a Kingfisher flight from Chennai to Kochi on August 3. The victim's husband was quoted on a TV channel saying that the culprit, who originally had a different seat on the substantially empty flight, took one immediately behind the woman when the plane was set for take off. According to him, the man grabbed his wife from behind once the cabin lights were switched off for take off. The lady raised an alarm and told the cabin crew who rushed to her. Other passengers, mostly belonging to Kerala, identified the culprit A MINISTER FROM CURRENT CPM LED GOVERNMENT!!! The passenger list of the airline confirms that the minister alleged to be involved is P J Joseph. It was during the previous CPM led government their state Transport Minister A Neelalohita Dasan Nadar had to resign for sexually harassing IAS official Nalini Netto.

Not to be left behind UDF had infamous Industry Minister, P K Kunhalikutty of icecream parlour sex scandal. He sexually exploited Rejina a minor who worked as a counter girl at the RKS Ice Cream Parlour.

I am not sure how much low Indian Politics can fall? Well what more can we expect froma State Givernment when we have Rapists, Murderers etc in the cabinet.

It is Science. STUPID!

Its again and again proven that Stupidity has no boundaries.

'Allah's karishma' at Mahim
Mahim beachfront is known to be one of the most polluted in the world. In normal circumstances, People will not even touch the seawater there unless you want to get some sort of skin disease. But last week thousands thronged to the Mahim creek to drink the normally filthy coastal water believing that it was holy.
On Friday night after local fishermen washed their hands in a stream off the Mahim bay after namaaz and allegedly found that the water was sweet, word began to spread about the 'miracle'. The miracle-tales were further stoked by the fact that the 'happening' had occurred in the vicinity of the old Mahim Dargah.
It was hilarious that Mineral Water Vendors did brisk business selling for as high as Rs 50. People bought the bottles and promptly emptied the contents into the sea and filled the bottles with sea water! Tell me how more stupid you can get!
The Water samples show that the water is highly unfit to drink, It would be Allah's karishma if they donot die of Gastroenteritis and other water-borne diseases. Now already overloaded BMC is bracing themselves for a possible outbreak of waterborne diseases.
Of course the simple explanation of Dilution will not hold water when it comes to matters of faith

From A Election Website

Guess who send his resume to Monster.com

Now Playing

I am huge fan of Bollywood movies. There is something immensely compelling about them, in spite of their somewhat common storylines.
I am currently watching a new tearjerker.
The hero is from Chakwal district of the undivided Punjab - what is now a part of Pakistan. He comes from a very poor family and was the first one in his family to go to High school. His father dropped out of school in Class VIII and became a freedom fighter. So he has the blood of a freedom fighter flowing through his veins.
He worked hard to reach top government post. The villians conspire and he is reluctantly dragged into the politics. But he is not a politician... maybe a latecomer to politics.
Fifteen Years back, he rolled out some initiatives which would have helped the poor immensely. But People didnot realise the benefit and he was criticised— names and epithets were used.
Now he is trying to do something very big. All his friends and enemies are against this move. He becomes emotional. He cries out saying "I can say in all faithfulness—in the two years, three months, that this nation has entrusted me with, it has been my effort to do the very best to serve vital national interests. (Whether) I am strong or weak — history will determine"
The nation watches stunned...
Friends this was not a movie but taken directly from the reply of our Prime Minister to Nuclear Bill Discussion!

Actual Maths Answer Sheets

Practical Joke 1:

Step1: Go to www.google.com
Step2: Type "failure"
Step3: Hit "I'm Feeling Lucky" Button & See the result

Another Independence from Terror

Another Independence Day is here. A proud day for "most" of the Indians. Its today 59 years ago, we got our independence thru a unique Non Violent Struggle.
Today should be the day of celebrations and pure joy. However, when I look around I see a nation under siege. Every vital installation & Place in the country looks like a fort.
- Indira Gandhi Centre for Atomic Research: The Indian Army along with the commandos of the National Security Guards (NSG) has taken over security of the Indira Gandhi Centre for Atomic Research (IGCAR) at Kalpakkam, imposing an ‘informal curfew’ in and around the facility within a radius of 8 km.
- DELHI: Tens of thousands of police and paramilitary soldiers were deployed across the Indian capital, a city of 14 million people, where terror attacks were feared the most. Sharp shooters stood atop government offices, while security forces placed barricades on almost all major streets of the city.
- MUMBAI: Mumbai looks like a fortess.
- Kasmir: Nothing new in Kashmir which always looks like Fortess, Except some of the Kasmiris celebrate Independence day as Black Day
- Assam: Assam on Saturday sounded a maximum security alert, deploying army, police and paramilitary soldiers in vulnerable areas ahead of Independence Day celebrations even as the toll from an overnight landmine explosion went up to six.
- Central India: Central India is on alert for suspected Naxal Attacks

Seems that no part of India is safe. Is this our achievement in last 59 years. We are ruled by a leader who is supported by a group who pride themselves as watchdogs. True to their word, Unlike other watchdogs these specimens only Bark. Perhaps, its contageous also as our PM also seems to be doing the same everyday.

We the Democratic Republic

We take pride in calling ourselves the largest Democracy in the world. In the last elections, more than 600 Million of us voted out a Government which ruled us for more than 5 years. The Power tansfer was smooth withour even a mumur of protest.

Now lets step back and take a realistic point of view of the government what we have today:-

- We are lead by a Prime Minister who has not even won a Municipal election in his entire political life.

- Our Defence Minister has not been elected been elected to Loksabha EVEN ONCE.

- Our Home minister is a political Non Entity

- In the cabinet we have Laloo Prasad Yadav, Union minister for railways who is under trial for no fewer than seven cases, six of them criminal, relating to the infamous fodder scam, in which an estimated Rs 900 crore worth of non-existent fodder was purchased by a succession of governments in Bihar

- Ex Minister Taslimuddin faced nine criminal charges. According to a report of the legislative committee of the Bihar assembly in 1996, he was, even then, "a habitual criminal whose offences range from extortion, cheating and rape to dacoity and attempts to murder".

- Ali Ashraf Fatimi, According to police records, he is implicated with an inter-state gang of kidnappers that has kidnapped people for ransom in Maharashtra, Gujarat, Karnataka and UP. Fatimi, however, has only one criminal case actually registered against him, but the police says this is because he's enjoyed the unstinting protection of Laloo Yadav for the last 14 years.

So are we really Democratic. Is it not time to ponder

Do the right thing, fight for RTI

Right to Information Act, 2005 (RTI) is one of the best things which has happened in recent times. The original law is so powerful it can change the way people interact with government.

Under this Act, any citizen can approach any government department and seek any information with respect to the working of that department, inspect any files or take copies of any documents. They have right for the following:-

• inspect works, documents, records.
• take notes, extracts or certified copies of documents or records.
• take certified samples of material.
• obtain information in form of printouts, diskettes, floppies, tapes, video cassettes or in any other electronic mode or through printouts

The logic is very simple. In a democracy, people are the masters and Government exists to serve them. People have a right to know how they are being governed. We should have a right to question them on what decisions they take on our behalf and why such decisions are being taken.

The Supreme Court has observed that Right to Information is a part of Right to Speech & Expression, which is a fundamental right under Article 19(1) of the Constitution. According to the Supreme Court, Right to Speech & Expression cannot be exercised without Right to Information.

The Right to Information Act is a potent device to weed out corruption from government institutions. But the UPA Government seems to be bent on sounding the death knell for the RTI Act. It has moved to amend the law to exclude file notings. It is obvious that the political leadership is buckling under pressure from the bureaucracy. One wonders how file notings can be exempted from disclosure when they form an integral and inseparable part of the record.

We need to act now so that this important piece of legislation and weapon in the hands of common public is not thrown into garbage by this UPA Govt. and the White Elephant bureaucracy.

UPDATE VICTORY: IT IS A VICTORY OF DEMOCRACY AND PUBLIC OPINION THAT GOVERNMENT HAD TO BACKOFF AND MAINTAIN STATUS QUO

My Friend Called Gandhi

Last week, I met Gandhi, my best friend from kerala. Of course Gandhi is his nickname, He got it during our college days due to his insistence on using Swadeshi and belief in Non Violence. It is paradox that we had such a person in kerala, a state whose economy is based on NRI's and Political System draws heavily on Violence.

I could not believe my eyes and ears (literally), when I met him. Firstly because he started to speak in chaste American Accent and secondly he had a Black Eye. More than his black eye, I was more intrigued by his American Accent as he had never left the shores of Kerala.

Nothing had prepared me for the explaination, he gave for his condition. "I have married to a girl who works in a Call Centre" was his explaination. He elaborated that his wife is employed in a Call Centre who supports customers in US and she was trained to speak in english in US accent. The poor thing has got so used to American English that she speaks American English even at home which rubbed on to him also. I can only imagine the confusion at home. Since his wife follows American Working Hours, its good evening from her when its morning for him and at night its good morning. You can imagine the "things" they might be missing, no wonder he used to go missing during lunch hours. They have two lovely kids Kittunni and Kannan whom she started calling kit and Kat. He almost had a heart attack when she started calling him Dick, short of Diwakaran.

The breaking point happened when he realised she is working in a company promoting viagra. He like any of us would do confronted her but he did not realise that now all young females in call centres are being trained martial arts. Rest is history.

Pesticola

I am not sure on why all the controversy surrounding the finding that there is unacceptable ammount of Pesticide in Coca Cola and Pepsi.

I being an eternal optimistic always like to look at the bright side of things so I decided to develop develop a list of Advantages:-

- First of all, It is not Cokes or Pepsi's mistake that there is pesticide in the drinks. Those guys donot import water they are using the water we give to them. They just sweeten it for us. Indians are reaping what they sowe.

- One of the side effects of lindane (one of the pesticide found in Coke and Pepsi) is it can reduce the sperm count. Imagine the Positive impact at a time when government is trying hard to reduce the population. I would suggest that Govt. must make it compulsary that every able bodied male should have a coke or pepsi every day. Never Mind that its banned in most of the countries. Na Rahega Baas No Bajega Basuri.

- This is the age of multiple use stuff. We have cellphone which can be used as camera etc. Hey now we have Softdrinks which can feed both human and plants. Zero Wastage. Infact, the softdrink companies should be given "innovation of the year" award.

- Chlorpyrifos(another pesticide found in Coke and Pepsi) is effective in controlling cockroaches, flies, termites, fire ants, and lice. For me, this seems to be the ultimate baygon spray. At Roadside Dhabas, before food, first sprinkle the table with some softdrink it will kill all the flies there. I have even started to bathe my dog with softdrink to kill all the lice on him.

Footnote: Who else will give us a product with so many uses in 5 Rs.?

Proud Mallu

Name the wonly part of the werld where Malayalis don't werk hard?
Kerala.

Why is industrial productivity so low in Kerala?
Because 86% of the shift time is spent on lifting, folding and re-tying the lungi.

Why did the Malayali buy an air-ticket?
To go to Thoobai, to meet his ungle in the Gelff.

Why do Malayalis go to the Gelff?
To yearn menney.

What did the Malayali do when the plane caught fire?
He zimbly jembd out of the vindow.

What is a Malayali management graduate called?
Yem Bee Yay.

Why did his wife divorce him?
Because he was louwing another woman.

Who found out that?
His andy.

What does a Malayali do when he goes to America?
He changes his name from Karunakaran to Kevin Curren.

What does a Malayali use to commute to office everyday?
An Oto.

Who is Malayali's fyamous yeactor end yaectress?
Moghan lal, Mammooti, Geedha, Revadhi, Zilgsmidha end Ambiga.

Why Kerala is the most highly literate state in India?
Its easily giving Degree to get rid of the peapals from Kerala.

Why Arab countreis are looking for only Keralites?
They are ready to do yennything for menney.

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT : Please don't delete this after reading, at least u should send this mail to:
10 Malayalis & you will receive cokknut oil,
20 Malayalis and you will receive bennena chips,
40 Malayalis you will receive appams,

Send this to 100 Malayalis, and you will get free land near the rice field behind the lungi factory with additional incentive of a whole month's supply of cokknut oil and bennena chips free.

I feel good

HEALTH QUESTION & ANSWER SESSION

Q:I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true?

A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?

A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.


Q:Should I reduce my alcohol intake?

A:No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!

Q:How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?

A:Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?

A:Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good !

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?

A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!!... Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?

A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?

A: Are you crazy?HELLO . Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around!

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?

A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.

Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?

A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!

Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.

And remember:
"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO, What a Ride"

Is this a consipracy?

Last couple of years were strange times for Hindus in India. We watched with dismay every symbol of our faith being attacked. I guess it started with the Outrageous arrest of Kanchi Seer Sri Jayendra Saraswathi. He was arrested during a midnight commando operation. We were told that haste was because he was planning to escape to Nepal in a helicopter. Personally, I am yet to see a helicopter which can fly from Hyderabad to Nepal. Also, when is the last time a Murder Suspect was arrested in a commando operation? Hope the same overzealous police is aware that there is a warrant against Imam Bukhari of Delhi in the Kerala High Court for the last 15 years, but no policeman had arrested him.

There were series of attacks on revered Hindu temples, RamJanam Bhoomi Temple in Ayodhya, Sankot Mochan temple in Varanasi to name a few.

Then there was the controversy surrounding ice lingam in Amarnath cave shrine. We were told that this year man-made lingam had been installed in the cave since the natural one failed to appear. Strangely, this lingam disappeared prematurely!

Now the evil shadow has been caste on the the Sabarimala Temple one of the most revered temples in South India. It started with a strange controversy in which an actress claimed that she had touched the Idol, an impossible feat considering the Idol is 11 feet inside Garba Griha.

More outrageous was the arrest and sacking of the one of the head priests of the Sabarimala temple. The whole issue started with the Thantri lodging complaint with the Kochi police alleging that he was taken to a house by a group of unidentified people and forced to pose for photographs with women. Police instead of helping him arrested him and he was sacked! The Secular Media Screamed" Sabarimala priest sacked after expose". Now it seems that the Tantri was victimized. The conspirators Shobha John along with her two aides was arrested from Kochi.

One incident can be a aberration, two a coincidence, three has to conspiracy!

Oh my Lord!

It seems offlate lord Aiyyapa is facing lot of problems from his overzealous Devotees. Its only weeks back a lady devotess claimed that she had touched him. A superhuman task considering the idol is placed 11 feets inside the Garba Griha. I tend to believe her as she is from Telugu filmworld, nothing is impossible for them. I have seen films in which they have done more difficult task like making a full dress from half inch towel etc.. Though, I am still trying to figure out how she hoodwinked the police who literally lifts you thru the 18 steps to the temple. How to put it, lets say she is well endowed to have escaped the hands of Police. Anyway, this incident has potential to generate employement for some unemployed. It seems Indian Young Lawyers Association (IYLA) and a group of women lawyers have filed a writ petition in the Supreme Court seeking directions to ensure that women devotees are not prevented from entering the shrine.

Now it seems a more dangerous breed has taken an active interest in the Temple. The breed is called VIP's. Yep the same guys who roam around with a red light on their head and big board on their back. It seems that they would like a special audience with Lord in a special enclosure in front of Sanctum Sanctorum. Afterall after days long work which VIP has patience to stand in queue with good for nothing common mass. Even handicapped or children are not allowed in booth.

Lord your were right in choosing a mountain to rest. Perhaps you should have chosen a taller Mountain. Can we say Mount Everest.

Mother of All bribes

The Tamil Nadu Government is all set to splurge crores of rupees of taxpayers' money on providing free colour television sets to all those who don't have one. Acting on a poll promise the ruling DMK had made in May, the Government has identified three suppliers for the first batch of 30,000 sets to be distributed in September.

Local Administration Minister MK Stalin announced in the State Assembly on Friday that the price of the first batch had been fixed at Rs 2,965 each. Thus, the first 30,000 sets would cost Rs 8.89 crores to the exchequer. The remaining 25 lakh sets would be procured through a global tender

To Unaware: It costs approx. Rs. 4500 to give primary education to a child. This mean that this would be sufficient to provide primary education for 3.7 Million Children. As per 2001 census, Tamilnadu has less than 5.6 Million Children in the age group of 5-9. This essentially means that the amount of money TN Govt. is spending on TV, THEY CAN PROVIDE FREE EDUCATION FOR ALL THE CHILDREN IN TAMILNADU

Plan your Future

I was told that I should plan my future. I should try to "invest" money for the future. So of late, I started to visit the money section of newspaper to find avenues to "Invest" so that I can "Plan" my future.

But nothing had prepared me for the news/Ad I read this morning. I read "Plan funeral now to make sure you have the final word". Gee.. thats a worthy "Investment" to "plan" the future! Ateast we are 100% sure of the event.

It seems that in US Average cost for funeral is USD 6,500 but sometime it can go to USD20,000. I think it would be worthwhile to study if funeral can be outsourced to a low cost country.

Robert Biggins, president of the National Funeral Directors Association adds that Planning our own funeral "eases the burden for families". I can almost hear family members saying: Hey Plan your future(or funeral) don't be a burden atleast after death.

So now you are convinced that you should plan your future. As always in US they also make you aware of your rights. Hmmm...Rights after death(thats an interesting proposition...).

Some of them are like, The funeral home is required to give you a free copy of the price list when you visit. I can imagine the discussion with the salesman.

Salesman: Sir, how can I help you?
Customer: I am planning my funeral, can you please help me.
Salesman: My Pleasure sir. We will help you all the way down (or up..)
Customer: I like Red Colour. Do you have anything in that colour? Do you think it will suit me?
and so on...

Another major option is Prepaid Funeral. But it seems that some families have lost their money when a funeral home went out of business. Who can blame the company, What are they supposed to do if the oldman just donot die. I guess the funeral companies may be sending an email saying "Due to Steep Increase in business in parts of Asia, we have decided to move our business to Asia in next 90 Days. If you die in next 90 days we would be able to do the cremation in US. However after 90 days you would have to travel to Asia for the same. Since you are our very special customer we can arrange for the transportation cost, However, This is a limited time 120 days offer"

Last but not the least. You are also allowed to leave instructions. According to Melanie Cullen, author of Get It Together: Organize Your Records So Your Family Won't Have To putting your letter of final instructions in a safe deposit box isn't a good idea. Apparently, If you die on a weekend or a holiday, your family may not be able to get to your safe deposit box until the bank opens. I guess she has not heard of Kerala, Where everyday is a holiday due to Bandh. On that note, can we give special instruction like "Please kick the ass of so and so, he had made my life miserable?"

So Guys what are you waiting for. Plan your future (or funeral)